scared. it seems scary, what little practice there will be. Why didnt i stay i dont understand myself, i must be mad. But at that moment i just didnt wanna continue. What regret there is. Anyway there was listlessness since morning. Kept thinking and thinking about irrelevant stuff. Trying to concentrate but those stuff just keep prying their way in. Thinking about the hours, the minutes, wonder if things will be complete.

Stupid brain. I cant control it. reminds me of this song:

Cuz its all in my head..
I think about it over and over again
And I can’t keep picturing you with him
And it hurts so bad, yeah
Cuz it’s all in my head
I think about it over and over again
I replay it over and over again
And I can’t take it yeah
I can’t shake it
Nooo..

Ah, yea. strikeout cuz that line is irrelevant.

weird feeling inside my head
is it something i ate,
or something you said?
honestly its make believe
lies slipping out right through my teeth.

why should people have to respond to me?
in this world im just nobody
why should i feel responsiblity towards you
you life is not my problem too..

wonder how much could be represented through these lines
these lines long or short, are just slaves of this mind
this mind cant think straight
choices cant be made
confusion strikes the mind in this head
this head that believes it is better to be dead.