gasp i had suuuch a weiird dream okayyy...

it was about shooting club. We were having the training camp, at some lodge in a forested area. Our cabins were like hobbit holes. so.. it was elections time!! I dreamt about andy making his speech! And it began with him showing a video, which had himself in it, and everyone calling his name and chasing after him going andy andy andy andy! like crazy fans. And at one point in the video it showed him doing a back-flip like action and i commented andy's dam bendy! Then he was gonna start his speech but somehow the scene changed to me planning my speech. But somehow i dreamt about a poem instead! In my dream it was a really long and wholesome poem but i only remember the first two lines now...

Elections in the month of May!
Joannah and her team made it to this day!

okay.. it was a really weird dream and there were other things happening that i dont quite remember now, those are the Main most interesting bits...

ah yea yea yea. Apart from the fact that i feel once again drawn towards the Tolkien realm, other strange things have been happening to me. The thing is, i've been dreaming of getting myself cut and bloodied pretty frequently. Ok twice, not that frequent. But the two instances were close together...

The first was some accident. Some natural disaster that landed me in this place with glass shards all around. [i remember the lighting was a dark romantic orange, like after a fire.] The glass shards were stuck in the back of my hand, my palm and my arm. I was squeezing them out, and they just slipped out, like how you squeeze a plastic cup filled with water and the water just seeps out. Yea they slid out, and my hand was comparable to the likes of shredded paper. It was literally in sections. I couldnt lift my hand, because my hand wouldnt stay in one piece. My friends were trying to get me to stand but i couldnt because my hand was just too screwed up. They had to bandage it up by tying a cloth around it to keep the pieces together. And it was all bloody and gore. And fallen wood littered around the orange room..
I had this dream while sleeping at the atrium. Must have happened in a pretty short time. Or it could have been a half hour dream.

Now for the other one, happened just yesterday night/this morning. I forgot what the dream was about, but i remember that at one point, i was looking at koi in a pond, and the koi were all sliced up, they were split open all the way down their spines and there were horizontal slits across that line. They weren't in pieces though, they swam around in that top-split state. Like a slice of mango that you cut into cubes while preserving the presence of the skin and then flipping it such that the cubes open outwards. [I thought of this comparison in my dream]. And then the next moment, it appeared i was sitting on a high chair, beside this pond. I was holding a carving knife of some sort, and it pretty much doubled up and plunged itself deep into my thigh. What in the worldd right... Anyway there was blood flowing flowing flowing, and someone asked me what the hell that thing was doing in my leg and i was like i cant get it out, its just stuck there. And really it was stuck, like it had a life of its own and chose to stay there. I dont remember if the matter was resolved.

So, what could these dreams mean?

And so began the march of the lost and unknown...

Over the bridge and
Under the snow
Marching through earth
the dry leaves go
crackling under their feet
Hear them crying
The winds and the woods
are dying, dying.

Eyes wide open
but distant, forlorn.
Their fears had come true
the Curse had been born
It marked the beginning of
endless struggles with fate
Man ceased to live.
And the lands ceased to breathe.

Nowhere to go,
just marching through air
The plains before them lay
Barren.
Bare.

who am i deceiving
how does the world see me
a package ripped open
by my own stupidity.

The gap is too m u c h.

so today was quite a difffferent day. had to print 100 brochures so i brought 100 papers, and got some from william and xr. So during pe and break i went to bytes and printed like 80 copies, i hope i wasnt overkilling the printer man :/ then after sch printed another 20. printing that 20 took longer than even printing that 80. There were so many people printing stuff and they accidentally used some of myyy brochure paper to print their stuff!!! They returned it in blank papers though. Then had to staple the brochures together. XD was there to help but he kept running off to watch his friends play whatever computer game that i couldnt be bothered to keep walking over [which i was doing earlier] to say you can go help staple now. So i just stapled the rest after folding them into a booklet. AND also we were short of paper.

I was like saying theres 89 copies
XD: thats not enough.
me: yea we have to buy paper.
XD: *goes off to watch friends play*
me: *huh wth* goes and buys paper.
I came back and printed the rest.
XD comes along and says: where'd you get the paper from?
me thinking wth.: i bought it.

lame right. wth la.

rah.. anyway after that was supposed to go CDANS to help hang the banner. We left at 430. William forgot to bring the banner home yesterday so he was sewing at home, but when we got there he was there already. It was just me, XD and William. We carried lots of newater and target cards up to the range at cdans. Then there was some problem with the poles William brought for the banner. They were FAR too short!! He had to go buy new poles so XD and I counted cards while he went to buy the new poles. Good thing cdans had a SAW and we could saw the new poles to the right length. The banner went up eventually. Had to cut it at the top as usual, so that it could stretch over the cupboard. But, the paper tape behind the cloth was too obvious so XD had this awesome idea of just sticking a huge long piece of paper tape along the whole edge. It didnt turn out too bad. Looks like a border. and KAISHENG didnt paint the border!! sigh the banner looks so plain we should have pasted paper tape ALLL around it.

went home around 730 reached home around 850 lalala. the day is tmr!!

Ahh i like keep posting this in the wrong place Y_Y.

and so today huiwei wanted to go get her bag [finally.] ahh first we went to seoul garden [first time for me], becuz i had the vouchers from deal! So yea, free meal lolo. Was supposed to be treating huiwei, but huiwei felt rich and xiu rong felt poor!! So part of the voucher went to xiu
rong instead. quite nice luh, though not a lot of choice of food. [I think the desert part was nice]

yahh anyway we were happy and full after that [starving prior to this cuz xiu rong was making us wait for her] and we went to this toy store place that had stuff made of wood, and there was this box that was to be opened in a secret way. So i stood there for a while trying to open the box while xiu rong was trying to solve a horseshoe puzzle. The box is like cool la, you can hide stuff in it and people who dont know how wouldnt be able to open the box! its totally concealed. i managed to open the box eventually though, and so did xr, becuz it had been put through endless abuse by others who tried, so how to open it was quite obvious. didnt bother trying to solve the horseshoe though.

And off we went to heeren to find huiwei's bag. walkwalkwalkwalk. Walk here walk there [yea, this always happens when going out with huiwei] walkwwalkwalk. cannot find! ahhh, nevermind! go cine. walkwalkwalkwalkwalkwalk. oh oh xiu rong managed to buy her cloth food finally! yay for her. so continue walking. lalala. STILL CANNOT FIND. So we decided to go marina, since huiwei said she saw it there, [a few weeks ago!!] So we went there, and went to puma, and nike.. and STILL DONT HAVE!! By this time xr and i wanted to puke blood le. But heng! we stepped into royal sporting house. SUCH a BEEEG place. So i was like, so big!! better find sth arhrhhhahrhrah. and walking a few rounds later, we FINALLY. got sth. HENG man. by this time i and xr's feet were dying and we were like, yea yea nice, yea. JUST BUY THAT ONE LA. so we finally got her bag! yayay.

Then she also wanted to get slippers. But that one wasnt so bad. And somemore buy two!! and gave me the other half of each pair! lol. but so tired. sigh. everytime going out with huiwei is like around the world in 4 hours. whee

There was sports day today, i ran 4x100 for house and 4x400 for cca.

the 4x400 one was really epic okay..

its like at first we didnt have to run cuz we didnt even make the heats, but some teams pulled out and in the end we still got in??! and we were all prepared to not run Y_Y

wu duo didnt bring a shirt, and shujen was too tired, so we changed people, dragged ailin and verene to run C: ailin super pro, glad we got her to run.

we were in lane 8, which is quite a horrible lane cuz it always seems to be longer.

So anyway ailin started off quite good, we werent very far back, but then we started lagging O: by the time it was my turn [me fourth runner Y_Y cuz i lost scissors paper stone to sinhang [aiya dunno how to spell her name X:]] we were 7th!! gosh. rahhhh then my turn, then i think the ppl when they started they ran quite fast :/ so at the 200m mark i caught up with one person.. at 300m another person... then after that another person... 3 ppl!!! wahhaha!! but i was dying by that time, like reallyyyy dyingggg, i forced myself past that last person that i caught up with... then like a few steps away from the finish line my legs like wanted to give way!! rahh.. then i think i slowed down!!! then suddenly this blue shadow from nowhere just PUSHED past me!!! NOOH1!!!!!! then we got forth!!!! arhhhhgggg.... becuz i slowed down!!!! wth laa... it was SOOO close!!!

aiya nvm. i love the milo truck.

Aerius got 3rd overall C:

gosh. i so feel like dying! luckily i didnt go with hw and xr and js to kbox or i will just go there and choke and die on the air con. rah!!! my nose keeps running, it hates me!! its givin me a stupid headache grahh stupid! i wonder how much energy is required for every time you blow your nose man.. i think i've had an equivalent of running 2.4 already if you combine sneezing and blowing nose... and the weather is so hot and im sneezing! I'm so living on the wrong planet...

and doing bio really uses up a lot of pencil lead man... what briefly describe! their briefly is like sooo brief. it should just become a briewasp. ok make no sense. fly. wasp. ok wasp are bigger..

rahhhh, im wasting the resources of the earth!! tissue will soon be scarce! grah! someone please catch my nose for me, stop it from running...

im so bored i can probably be tricked into thinking rubbing an orange for long enough will make it catch fire.

whether or not with or without, wondering is the only way out.
.leaving me some time to think
thinking till im out of ink.

A
lone
ranger
drawing
pictures
in the sand.
He
held
the
branch
tightly
in his
bandaged hand.
Circles.
He
drew
circles
that went
round
and
round.
Like
wishing
hard
for
something
that
has
no
end.

rah! i havent been here for some time now... anyhows maybe i should start thinking of stuff that i havent written about. hhmm! oh oh oh. my weird dream. again! yup, another weird dream..

ok it went like this.. i went to sleep, at around 1+ i think, on saturday MORNING. yea, and then my sis came into the room and she asked to switch on the light for a while and so i said okay. Then later when she offed it, she came back after a while and switched on her com. I could see the faint orangey light from where i was [on the 2nd storey of double decker bed] and i could hear her typing. Everything normal for now? yes normal.

then, i drifted in and out of sleep, and everytime i drifted out, i woke to hear my sis typing, and i opened my eyes to see the faint orange light. At one point i dreamt of being in math class and saw that someone had left behind a whole array of orientation fullscap. I wanted to take some, cuz that day i was trying to find nice fullscap but failed. Anyway i drifted out again, saw the light, heard the typing, and drifted back.

Then at another point, suddenly there was this raccoon scampering across the edge of my bed. It looked more like a weasel cuz it was pretty elongated, but it had the markings of a raccoon. And i identified it as a raccoon. I was telling my sis hey come and see theres a raccoon on my bed! And i saw the orange light, and i heard the typing. I tried to prevent the raccoon from running away, but it turned around and bit me. I literally went ow ow ow in my dream, and i really felt its bite. And moved my hand. [the left hand] Then i 'woke up'. the raccoon was actually a rubber band that got wrapped around my hand accidentally [rmbr i wear rubber bands on my wrist] And then i WOKE UP. And realised i dont wear rubber bands on my left hand. O: And when i WOKE UP, there was no orange light, no typing, my sis wasnt even in the room or using the com. All the time i woke up, i woke up in my dream. Not in real life. Oh gosh. And it felt so real.

eep. eep.eep.

yay theres half day tmr! sch ends at 120! hooray. too bad for those who end sch at 2 lolol. or 1230. so sad.

ok that was random. grah, my leg has the tiredness that cannot be rested! do you know whats that? its like this really really suan feeling, and no matter how you relax, it persists! And its horribly suan. rah!

urm okay. time to blog in rifle girls blog for monthly shoot and cdans? but a bit long ago :X

ta.

i had a dream this morning, and it went something like a quest. I dont remember much of it, just bits and pieces here and there. Running around, finding stuff, solving puzzles, so on and so forth..

i dont remember it, much as i want to.
_______________________________
what light is there that brightens up
but turns out to be something else?
that kind of light just darkens dark
and makes you think about yourself.

one day, a large sigh escaped. oh damn, come back! Ah, but the large sigh lightens the weight of the air bag. The large sigh, like a cat? Out of the bag? Like, when a large sigh escapes it reveals something about what someone is thinking. Maybe? Ok what rubbish.

Based on a true story:

one day huiwei was really frantic!

she thought lost her phone. gasp!

so, what did she do?? She called XR!

i think i lost my phone she says!

XR wonders for a bit. She looks at the caller id. Then suddenly.

If you lost your phone, then what are you calling me with?

. . . .

. . . .

ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh??? goes huiwei

ahahahha!! omg?? ow.. realization hits her.

huiwei is hilarious.

yay. im so happy for my standing broadjump. 201cm. My first try was 189cm. and i didnt get C for sit and reach. yea man. i got D! No la jk.. got B, like, scrapped it. Do sit and reach like running marathon liddat. Use so much energy and strength and my leg almost wanna die and cramp. Stretch until arm wanna get dislocated liao then zhun zhun scrap 44cm. Dam lousy but i dont care! I didnt get C hah. But then shuttle run very sad. Last year 9.9 then this year 10.4. I feel that its very slow. Sit ups also do until almost died. I am like dam lousy i cant do sit ups, without Gillian's encouragement i would have given up long ago, but thanks to her i kept doing until like wanna die and only do 43. Pull ups, every year also same la. Every year do 23. My left hand like never do anything, i can obviously tell that im using my right hand to pull myself then at the end only my right hand shaking, left hand so shuang and relac. The moment my right hand shake i dont wanna do already so never force. Only this one [and maybe standing broad jump] didnt do until wanna die. Yay its over, napfa over. Although i cant get full marks but i dont care. Dont wanna dislocate my arm. Oh yea, my 2.4 also record time, dam cool lar, used to be so slow when i never stop at all [my stamina sucks] i never stop i run 14 sth sth. This time i decided to stop 30seconds for every round and guess what! 12.14! yay yay yay. Thats why stopping is good. Urh, but stop liao after that must really run the rest of the round, not jog...

ok. dammit, this post is dam singlishy and nonsense. I dont care. the time is 1203. I feel bored.

disappeardisappeardisappeardisappeardisappeardisappeardisappeardisappear

different thoughts different scenes
different hearts and different dreams.

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i dont even know when it started to hurt. when did fullstops start looking like collens. :::

freezing on the bus, there i was sitting alone
i could feel the chill penetrating through my bones
though its really freezing it still feels quite nice
the rain that greets my skin is as cold as ice
the weather's fit for a good long sleep
i'll be buried in my pillows as the heavens weep.

ok that was actually for yesterday. cuz the rain was blasting down and i had a retarded experience > <>

the people of this world. just hate them. so many liars, so many cheats, so many fakes. hypocrites. people saying stuff to make you sabotage yourself. people who confuse you. people who delude you. just want to stab myself with toothpicks. right through to the bone.

i cant face up to the people of this world. i've found the reason that makes me shake. how many people in this world are actually true to you? in everything they say or do?

how many are just out to hurt you?

this mental breakdown just makes my eyes hurt. im sorry.

thnks jo.