nvr knew such fear, only the kind you can feel when you're left in the dark, fearing the worst, worse than monsters standing over my bed in the dead of the night, I was just scared something would happen based on memories of the past. the same thing mustn't happen to you.

can't lose you.

random lame post

topped up my ezlink card on 9/2, 13/2, 17/2, 19/2, 23/2 each time $10. That's 50 prickin' dollars on transport in less than a month. And i stay at hostel. Wow. if i stayed at home i would die of starvation from transport alone.

When i talk to people then i realise how much in life i've forgotten about.

I want to have a goal now.

I need this motivation.


I'm just thankful to have my friends as my friends and not anyone else cuz as far as i know, these are the best friends anyone can ever have.

One does not need a lot of friends. But a lot of friendship in the few special ones.

it's not so easy to be happy when one is in a perpetual state of depression.

I don't really know why i am so easily upset, but i know that i cannot help it. I try very hard to control it because it makes the others around me annoyed, frustrated, rather than sympathetic, but i just cant seem to stop it from taking over me. When i recount the incidents, i feel the exact same sadness. Thus a drastic change in mood. Simply by recalling.

How can i explain myself?

They don't seem to understand that i am genuinely hurt.

That i don't wish to be this way. I don't wish to spoil the day but there are so many triggers around me that make me end up drowning in all my emotion. I tried hard to force the smiles.

But they rather not come near me than understand.

on a side note, i have checked. i lost my laptop on 11/11/10, found it on 14/02/11. 3 months.

just met some plain retarded Indian kids in the lift, who thought it such a brilliant idea to raise their voices to maximum power and talk and laugh and shout becuz it's so fun to hear their voice so loud in a small enclosed space. such idiotic behaviour really pisses me off and demands that I let it out. and it was so loud it hurt. thank goodness the trip was short. stupidity in it's truest form, no concern for others around whatsoever. had the good mind to smack their fat faces in had it not been 3-1. I hope someone slams a pan into their ears one day.

I got a laptop for valentine's day

MY LAPTOP IS FOUND!!!

AFTER WHAT, 3 MONTHS OR STH??? okay i dont have the exact date right now but i will check once i get home.

MIRACLE OR WHAT MANNN...

all becuz of the power of the aura of my honeybunny!!!

i wish to jump off the edge of the world.

before I proceed to rant on the happenings of cny so far(so far since it lasts for 15 days though only the first 3 or so are celebratory), I must first mention this random discovery!

either I haven't had milk tea for a long time... or Gong Cha milk tea is REALLY NICE!! I am pleasantly surprised! had a craving for bubble tea, and also wanted to find a place to squat, googled for directory of bedok point n discovered there is a gong cha here. so I proceeded to buy a normal milk tea, thinking how stupid it is to pay 2.20 for normal milk tea, but refusing to add a few cents for the house specials (which I did not want to risk anyway). And tada. I had my squatting area n my bubble tea. apart from the ridiculously long straw (portion sticking out of cup is about as tall as the cup itself), the milk tea is really fantastically tasty man. I feel like I'm drinking a baby lamb. okay, the idea is soft fluffy clouds n floating in the sky~ it's really wondercrumpilicious!!

or, I just haven't had milk tea in a long while!

Happy chinese new year!!!

and thanks for all the birthday wishes! :D